Hurts So Good
by Marianna Morgan
Summary: E/O Challenge - The trick was to keep the practice hidden from Dean, who would most certainly mind his little brother's new hobby.
1. Chapter 1

**E/O Challenge Word**:

**trick** /trik/ n. – A cunning act or scheme intended to deceive; a clever way of doing something.

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><p><strong>SpoilersWarnings**: extremely vague spoilers for 7.02, plus just a general dark topic

**Disclaimer**: Not mine

**Word Count**: 101

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><p><em>I hurt myself today to see if I still feel. I focused on the pain, the only thing that's real. ~ Johnny Cash<em>

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><p>It started small, as most things do.<p>

A nick here; a prick there.

Nothing major.

Just enough pain to provide a momentary distraction from the constant hum of indistinct sounds; a brief reprieve from the sweetly mocking voice that always rang so clear.

But now...now it was worse.

Cuts – deep ones – were the only way to keep Lucifer at bay.

And strangely enough, Sam did not mind.

The trick was to keep the practice hidden from Dean, who would most certainly mind his little brother's new hobby.

Lucifer smiled, leaning against the locked bathroom door. "I won't tell if you won't."


	2. Chapter 2

**E/O Challenge Word**:

**grade** /grād/ n. – A particular level of intensity.

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><p><strong>SpoilersWarnings**: none, just continuation of general dark topic

**Disclaimer**: Not mine

**Word Count**: 115

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><p><em>What red devil of mendacity  Grips your soul with such tenacity? ~ William Blake, "The Liar"_

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><p>It was sometimes said that truth reveals itself a little at a time.<p>

And for Sam, it began with a low-grade fever; the kind that made his cheeks flushed and his bangs damp and made Dean ask how he felt.

"Fine," Sam responded casually over breakfast, even as he remembered how the knife had sliced through the soft skin on the underside of his forearm just an hour earlier; even as he could still feel the radiating pain and the slow ooze of blood beneath his dark blue, long-sleeved shirt.

Dean narrowed his eyes over his coffee cup.

Lucifer chuckled from where he sat beside Dean in the red vinyl booth. "Liar, liar...pants on fire."


	3. Chapter 3

**E/O Challenge Word**:

**sore** /sôr/ n. – A raw or painful place on the body.

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><p><strong>SpoilersWarnings**: none, just continuation of general dark topic

**Disclaimer**: Not mine

**Word Count**: 135

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><p><em>You and me and the devil makes three. ~ Emmylou Harris<em>

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><p>They were only five miles out of town when it started.<p>

_Again._

"I'm not touching you..."

Sam blinked at the finger in his peripheral, uncomfortably close.

"I'm not touching you..."

Sam sighed and turned his head, looking out the window as cornfields flew by.

But the finger followed, still unnervingly close to actually touching him.

"I'm not touching you..."

Sam closed his eyes and squeezed his arm – _hard_ – picturing the inflamed, self-inflicted cuts beneath the fabric of his long-sleeved shirt; relishing the instant pain that flared in and around the open sores.

Dean glanced at his brother from the driver's seat and frowned. "Sammy? You okay?"

Sam opened his eyes but did not dare look to his left. "Yeah."

And Lucifer smiled from where he sat in the middle of the Impala's front bench seat.


	4. Chapter 4

**E/O Challenge Word**:

**box** /bäks/ v. – Fight an opponent using one's fists.

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><p><strong>SpoilersWarnings**: none, just continuation of general dark topic

**Disclaimer**: Not mine

**Word Count**: 328...yet another triple drabble today

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><p><em>Fight the devil...fight the devil...you fight the devil every day. ~ Angelrage<em>

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><p>Sam sighed, leaning against the hood of the Impala as he watched Dean through the motel office's window and waited for him to finish reserving their room for the night.<p>

Dean had looked at him worriedly when Sam had insisted on getting out of the car while he waited.

"Why?" Dean had asked.

Sam had shrugged. "Just 'cause," he had answered and then had added, "Need some air," when Dean had continued to stare at him – but had left out the part about Lucifer having ridden between them the entire day, slowly suffocating him with his presence.

Speaking of...

Sam glanced to his right just as a fisted hand came to an abrupt stop in front of his face, mere inches from his nose.

Sam blinked on reflex, and Lucifer smirked – clearly delighted – before resuming his boxing routine; feet shuffling in the dirt...and yet leaving no mark.

Sam had already checked.

"C'mon, Sammy..." Lucifer taunted, throwing another punch. "Let's rumble, huh?"

Sam sighed, reaching for his arm – the arm he regularly cut – and squeezed hard; closing his eyes and swallowing against the resulting pain; _the pleasurable pain_.

"Alright, Sam. Let's..." Dean's voice faded as he exited the motel office and took in the sight of his brother leaning against the Impala.

Sam's eyes were closed and...

Dean narrowed his own eyes.

Was that blood on Sam's sleeve?

"Sam..." Dean called.

Sam startled, blinking rapidly as he focused on Dean standing under the parking lot lights.

"Yeah..." Sam responded hoarsely, hand still gripping his arm as it rested on the hood of the Impala.

Lucifer froze beside Sam, instantly realizing what Dean had finally noticed.

"Is that blood?" Dean asked worriedly, coming closer to the car and pointing over the hood at Sam's arm. "Are you bleeding?"

Sam said nothing, only swallowed against the lie that immediately rose in his throat.

Lucifer chuckled. "Ah..." he drawled and smiled as he came to prop against Sam. "The plot thickens...huh, Sammy?"

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><p><strong>TBC<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**E/O Challenge Word**:

**hold** /hōld/ v. – _held, past participle_; keep or sustain in a specified position.

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><p><strong>SpoilersWarnings**: none, just continuation of general dark topic

**Disclaimer**: Not mine

**Word Count**: 120

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><p><em>You better be careful what you do. I wouldn't wanna be in your shoes if they ever found you out. ~ Miranda Lambert<em>

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><p>Sam held himself completely still; as if he would just fade into the night if he didn't move; as if Dean would forget what he had just seen, would forget the crimson-colored clue to Sam's well-kept secret.<p>

Lucifer chuckled from where he continued to stand beside the youngest Winchester. "I think he still sees you," he whispered into Sam's ear.

Sam blinked across the hood of the Impala as Dean continued to stare at him; his brother's gaze flickering between Sam's face and the blood staining his sleeve.

"Sam..." Dean called quietly, seeming to suddenly sense that Sam was fragile; that Sam was seconds away from either bolting or collapsing...and that even Sam didn't know which he would do yet.

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><p><em><strong>TBC<strong>_


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